- Thesis: The California budget cuts are mainly affecting those who are college students in the state because their tuition is increasing to extreme amounts and students who had trouble paying for tuition before; the cuts just made it harder to pay for there education.
- Students are being denied from schools even though their grades are excellent
- If a student cannot pay for the college they want to attend without the help from scholarships or grants, then it is a minute chance that they will be attending
Body Paragraph II:
- The amount of money California State Universities, Universities of California, and community colleges are losing
- And the amount students have to pay in order to attend these schools
Body Paragraph III:
- Construction projects are put on hold at the moment from these cuts
- Tax rebates were being delayed as well
Conclusion:
- All in all, tuition for students is sky rocketing and the California college systems are having to lose money
- Students are unable to attend colleges because of their money problems; not because of their grades
http://www.insidehighered.com/news/2009/02/20/california
ReplyDeleteadam
This is not necessarily true: "The California budget cuts are mainly affecting those who are college students in the state"
ReplyDeleteReally? This is still too broad and very disputable. Why include Paragraph 3 topics? That seems out of place. Do you have evidence to prove that college students are unable to attend because of money issues? That's still very broad and not very evocative.